10 reasons You’re Married and Not Having Orgasms

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How many Orgasm have you had this week? Let’s face it as a wife and/ or mom, you get tired and you probably aren’t having sex as much as you would like, so why are you settling for mediocre sex once a week? Ladies orgasms matter, even when you are too tired. I can assure you, if you have mustered up the energy to make love to your husband you need to make sure it’s a mind-blowing experience At least more than half of the time. It’s not your partner’s fault that you aren’t having an orgasm, it’s yours. It’s your job to make sure you climax.

white bed in reference to orgasms

Did you know 75 percent of women can’t climax with just intercourse alone? And 15 percent never climax with anything at all according to this article from ABC news. It is my opinion that some women who are married, see the act of sex as a service strictly for their partner when they don’t feel like. News Flash, if a healthy man doesn’t feel like it, he mostly likely will end up climaxing regardless of how he feels. That’s the point of this post. Take charge of your orgasms. Always go into the act of intimacy with the intention to climax. You are already in the act anyway, you mind as well, “show up.” Intimacy in your marriage is never supposed to be a one-way street.

Reasons you are married & aren’t having orgasms

  1. You most likely think quickies is for your partner. This is not true, women should go into being intimate with their partner, thinking that, “this is for the both us.” Be honest, there are probably moments when you are just like, “I want to get this over with.”
  2. You are having too many quickies and not enough moments of true and pure intimate moments. Which probably means you two aren’t making the time to reconnect.
  3. This is important, you need to know how you orgasm, and what makes you climax. If you know these things, the result will be much better.
  4. You aren’t having open communication with your husband about what it is that you really like and enjoy. Here is the thing, if you don’t know what you like, he won’t either. The fun of being married and trusting sexual experiences with your partner, is trying things to see what you two like.

How to have more intense orgasms with your spouse



  1. You must be vocal about not having an orgasm. Seriously. I understand that life happens, and the percentage may not always be 100 percent, but it should be darn close. Your spouse has a love language. Figure out what that is and communicate with them in the manor they understand about what’s on your mind.
  2. The clitoris has over 8,000 nerve endings in this small little piece of flesh. That’s double the amount of nerves that’s in a penis. This is one of the reason’s women have such monumental orgasms. The trick is to learn how to properly stimulate it with your partner. It takes practice, but it’s well worth the work. Small Note: Try to aim a few centimeters above it or below. Remember to ask your partner to be delicate, if he doesn’t know. Clitoris’ are just as important as penis’
  3. Listen everyone isn’t the same body type. So, all those exciting things your girlfriend shared with you between her and her husband, may not work for you. And things that you enjoy, may not work for them. Each couple should find what works between them and dominate that move. You will have more success when you are confident at the things that you can do, and work toward experimental things one by one.
  4. OK ladies, I must be real. Tip one says be vocal, but after you are vocal, put on your sexy eyes, a little perfume behind your ears, turn on your favorite song, and show your husband, what you like…without saying a word. *Pause* Let’s back up a step. You can’t show him what you like if you don’t even know what you like. I know you are saying, girl I have been married for 50 thousand years, “I got this.” Then I will give you the blank stare. Things change shift, settle, and sometimes you may need to figure out what else you like. Add to what you already know and show your husband what else you may like.via GIPHY
  5. It’s mental. Women everywhere knows that intimacy for us starts in our mind, as opposed to in our pants. I agree your husband should start fourplay in advance to prepare you. But if you are in the season of quickies, because life happens. You need to prepare your own mind also. Think about your favorite feature on your husband. Or your favorite outing you went on. Think happy thoughts. I want you to be in charge of your orgasm and you can’t do that with an attitude every day.

BONUS: Breathe- Yes taking conscious deep breathes during intercourse will heighten your sexual experience significantly. An article by Self.com states a lot of women hold their breath during a climax, rather than letting your body take control and breathe through the orgasm to full experience the sensation. So remember when it’s finally time and you have done all the work, let go and enjoy the ride.

Girl listen, don’t take the information and think that you must be perfect. The point is for you to be conscious and aware of being intimate with your partner. You must understand what being intimate is about in the first place. And I can assure you that is not about you not climaxing constantly. It’s about Standing up for successful intimate moments, just like you would if your husband, doesn’t do something you asked. Take that same energy into your bedroom or kitchen, I’m not judging. Anything perceived with love will be well received. So, don’t be afraid to talk to your husband and Dominate your orgasms. Remember it’s your responsibility to make sure they happen.

10 ways to orgasm more



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